It kills me to have to do this!

Policies 

My views are clear, can we please talk to each other and be honest!

If I have to have a policy then that signals in the event things go wrong lets "call in the lawyers".

Theres only going to be one winner and it won't be you or I.

Respect - thats the answer, unfortunately its not instinctive, especially when you "feel" aggrieved.